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Here is the 15th in a series of Divorce Corp polls. Please vote only once.

[polldaddy poll=7833192]

 

And here are the results:

DC_PollQuestions_WordPress_No_15V2 results

 

We think that the results speak for themselves.  Should it really take 2 years to complete something that the Scandinavians complete simply by filling out a form?  And for those people who believe that the easy Scandinavian divorce system will increase the divorce rate, the opposite is true. The ratio of divorces per 1000 marriages is lower in Denmark, Iceland, Norway, and Sweden than it is in the United States. Even though divorce is so difficult and expensive in the United States, Americans file for divorce more frequently than Scandinavians, presumably because of the financial incentive that the US family law system offers the filing spouse.


103 thoughts on “How long did your divorce take, or if it is not over, how long has it been? Poll #15

  1. Most crooked courts in the nation. Family court is also up there. Read Gracie’s diary avaiale on Amazon.

  2. 4.5 years from filing to Final ruling.
    Another 3 years for appeal & remand,
    and of course, it’s never really over.

  3. There is no end. Court orders can always be modified. Even after a final decree. No one ever really ends their divorce. Just like no one is really married, since marriage is not an enforceable contract. It’s all a great big lie. Buyer beware.

  4. Women have forced men to lose their masculinity. We are looked at as just the seed planter. They don’t need us. So therefore they just seek divorce to move on after they get what they want. Not only that but men just blow off steam about their issues with their wives they never help each other looking for a divorce. Women gang up with their friends and never tell each other the truth. Sometimes the truth is brutal but needed for clarification. It’s always ” you don’t have to put up with that girls friend. He needs you. You don’t need him. Fact is we don’t need each other. We chose to share our lives together because it is mutually beneficial.

    • Winston, you sound as if your divorce was particularly painful. I think you’re absolutely correct in saying that men don’t support each other in things like divorce, which can get emotional and men have been told since birth (to everyone’s detriment) that they shouldn’t be emotional.
      You might try talking about divorce with other men who have been through it, and possibly you can get some needed support from the contact. If you know any women who might provide insight, it wouldn’t hurt to speak with them about their experience(s) either.
      Also, if you have any spare time at all, try to contact others who have had especially bad experiences in court and see if there’s anything you can do about it.
      Activity helps to reduce pain and frustration, and can be very useful to those around you as well.

  5. my divorce was quick. Even tho I requested that we have equal custody of our child & I did not want child support from him, the judge cared less about what we wanted and did the exact opposite. I was given primary custody and he was only given every other weekend and every Wen. 4pm to 7pm. And he was ordered to pay child support. We didn’t agree with that so we do our own thing. Any time he wants to see our child he does. Any time our child wants to go stay with his dad he does. And I give him the child support back because he spends just as much time or even more time with our son as I do. I wish more people could do that.

    • what you describe reads like a considerate approach and healthy arrangement. unfortunately, it is the anomaly with the overwhelming majority of Family Law matters dragging out for years
      with no end in sight…hopefully, the manner in which you and your ex are handling the situation will continue…however, you may wish to reconsider the returning of the court awarded c/s (circumstances inevitably change between former partners…no matter how civilized the intention).

    • But if you two could be that agreeable and cooperative in divorce, why didn’t you just stay married?

    • You are a rare person, Rene. It takes a huge amount of character and fairness to do what you’re doing with your ex. Kudos for being reasonable! But, the fact that the courts would not honor your wishes is a sign of how messed up the family courts are.

    • I wish I had been married to you !!! Are you dating ?? LOL You sound reasonable, rational, fair and mature. Our legal systems should produce the arrangement you are following (even though it opposes the court orders in the decree) and you manage to be civilized on your own !! Congratulations to you and your ex! I am sure your children will appreciate what you are doing when they are grown. You can hold your heads high with dignity.

    • In theory there is …Because in Michigan the Judges are overseen by the Judicial Tenure Commission (all lawyers), the Lawyers are overseen by the Attorney Grievance Commission, again (all lawyers), and on and on.. and who pays their salaries?! You and me but we are treated like dog shit on their shoes..

      Michigan is one of the most corrupt states in the Union, they have a well deserved F! for (lack of) integrity!! Check out your State’s Grade at http://www.publicintegrity.org

  6. Still dragging on, next court date is August 11, 2014. Family Court in Jefferson County Alabama is a joke, County is Bankrupt and can barely keep the court house doors open, too may corrupt politicians who are all now in Jail.

  7. I have been in court longer than I was married and lost my children to parental alienation by a system that was to protect us. Carnage is an appropriate word for the remains of this process!

    • Cindy, I can so relate to you on this! Its happening to me now, same situation. Keep your chin up!

  8. I have been in stuck in the “system” for over ten years and there is still no resolution. The lawyers and the courts are the only ones who have benefited from the breakdown of this family.

  9. My ex is dragging this out as long as she can in order to prevent me from moving and to drain as much money as possible.

  10. I checked the box 1-2 years because I HOPE the divorce will be finalized this month although I really can’t sure. I said the same thing last year at this time.

  11. Mine took so long because of a “third party” getting involved (ex’s girlfriend at the time) and making decisions for my ex. The court would not prevent her interference , therefore causing MULTIPLE hearings and thousands of dollars more in legal fees! “Family” courts should only allow the people directly involved to participate in the hearings.

  12. Is it EVER “over”? till the kids have earned PhD’s isn’t there always a chance that a guy can be dragged back to the House of Pain to fork over more money? I don’t think anyone rings a bell when it’s “over”… Can you define “over”?

  13. The divorce is not over until the man has his full ‘unabused’ rights back. So, when dealing with a bitter ex who dumped you because you were disabled, and with children the fun is just starting when divorce papers are signed. There is CORRUPTION in Annapolis, Maryland and the JUDGES and LAWYERS are RACKETEERING AGAINST anyone who is vulnerable in a misandrist method of systematic abuse of FATHERS, their children, the disabled and more …
    Here is a link to the TRUTH on ANNAPOLIS Family Law Corruption that everyone can learn from for FREE:
    https://www.facebook.com/TedPalmerRockvilleMD/posts/10203502388341864
    Thanks for producing and following up on this movie, which I hope turns into class action remedies, prosecutions, asset reclamations and seizures, and hangings for systematic abuse of our public.
    Sincerely,
    Ted
    Ted Palmer Forensic C.P.A. (ret.)
    Disabled Legally Abused Father of Two Innocent & Neglected Children

  14. We both wanted it done quickly and then the lawyers got involved. Three 1/2 years and over 35k in legal fees later, we got divorced. I have nothing left, have custody of my daughter, was forced in bankruptcy and have to pay alimony till death. My ex’s attorney convinced her that I was evil and she had a right to everything. So, I am broke and my ex doesn’t see her daughter, all because of the attorneys and judges. Welcome to New Jersey.

  15. My first divorce took around two years. My second divorce in 2008 only took a few months because we agreed on everything and never saw a judge and didn’t use lawyers. Even after agreeing on the divorce, I finished paying off my half of the joint debt, she has not paid anything, so we will be back in court next month. Even though the divorce is over, we still have issues to fight about.

  16. I was in a “childless” marriage for 21 years. He filed for the divorce in 2003 and I did NOT contest it. In fact, I counter filed to make sure that we would not have to play the game we had played in 1999 where he filed for a divorce and withdrew it 364 days later. We were in court for over 3 years because of a constant barrage of continuances granted to the plaintiff, by the judge.
    I have been free since October, 2007.

  17. The longer it takes, the more money they make. It is a SCAM!
    The divorce industry is the most incompetent and criminal industry on the planet as far as I can tell. Most everything they do is legal and against the U.S. and state constitutions. The U.S. Supreme court is ignored. Fact is the average custody battle is $78,000 (according to The Wall Street Journal), yet in many countries (as Divorce Corp, the movie states) all that is needed is a postage stamp for a far better outcome for all. This is fraud, anti-trust and child abuse for profit, on an institutional scale. Nothing more.
    Divorce lawyers are the scum of the Earth and the root of literally most social pathological, crime, drug abuse and even suicide today.

  18. Unfortunately, to answer this question, it is a bit more involved. We started out a getting a divorce using the same attorney to save money, but we had been separated for 3 years. As soon as my ex found out I had gone on with my life and met someone else, she switched attorneys without notifying me and filed for divorce without having me served. So she got the divorce very quickly because I was not there to even be part of the process. She was awarded sole custody but I was granted generous and liberal visitation the way it had been during the 3 year separation. Then the allegations began and all hell broke loose. We then spent another year trying to prove that I had not been properly notified of the divorce proceeding but the sheriff lied under oath about serving me. He claimed he slip it under the door, which in the first place is illegal and in the 2nd place was not possible with the way my front door was weather strip sealed. But of course, the judge believed the sheriff over me and did not care. Besides I had a really crappie attorney. So how long did the divorce take? It depends on when you consider the process was started.

  19. Simply a money making (money losing for the children and parents) process for the “courts”.

  20. My actual divorce took 6 years. I was in the court system for 14 years, til my youngest turned 18. Post degree, the last 8 years, I was in court an average of slightly more than once a month. Ridiculous process! It’s all about the $$$$…very sad for our children and the future of the country. Grateful for this website and the momentum family law reform is gaining nationally!

  21. Why do you spouses who make and earn morethan the other through hard work get that taken from them in a divorce? This communist law must be changed

  22. My divorce actually took 3 yrs 7 months. Continuance after continuance by the attorneys, especially hers and the judge which I believe were in collusion. I even went to jail for 10 days due to her attorney failing to provide a vehicle title which was given to him by my daughter and on top of that he committed perjury. At his request to the judge I went to jail.

  23. Still trying to get a date for the judge to decide how to settle. next court date August 11, 2014, going on 4 years.

  24. What I do not like about any poll is the narrowing of the question and answers. The time alone means nothing. The situation does. If it is the legal system making it last for ever for no reason other than money then they are wrong. If it is because one is trying to save a low conflict divorce that is only failing due to an individuals selfishness or miscommunication that can be solved through counseling then two years is not to long.

  25. A Divorce is never really “over.” Sure, legal matters may be over but if you have children, the feelings are long lasting. Even without having children together, there once was a time that you said “i do” and at least one of you really took your vow “until death do us part” seriously. There is not only a physical bong when two are married but also a spiritual bond as well. Questions, thoughts and feelings will always linger for those that are true in their hearts.

      • The problem arises when one member of the union grow abusive to the other. I could not stay in the negative environment anymore. I tried to grow past it but the stronger I got, the more I realized I had to get out.

        Divorce was not want I wanted but it turned out to be what I needed. I was married for 13 years. We spent 8 of them in therapy. I spent four of them so depressed I prayed God would take me in my sleep. Divorce has been hard but I’ve grown. My marriage was hard but I was dying spiritually.

        I do not believe the God of my understanding would have wanted one of Hid children to remain in such a state.

    • One must love oneself, if a person decide they don’t want to be married anymore then they failed to hold up to their obligation. Why should anyone dwell on some emotionally feeling attach to some vows. It does not seem logical that one should go against his own self. Usually the one who made the decision, base on money not to be married is the one who realize that it was not a good decision when they realize that the grass is not greener on the other side. If someone financially ruin someone a person has to be out of their mind to think about a vow someone else broke to God and to you in front of hundreds of witness in some cases. judges lawyers and some other court employees are spiritually lost. And do not realize what they are putting on themselves. until they are on their dying bed and the torment that one will had to go through will be unbearable, Knowing you destroy families and most of all children lives everyone is not going to be forgiven. To do right is already in you continue to ignore it you will be responsible for your action

  26. I find the current status quo of divorce unconscionable. After losing most of my savings and inheritance to a gold digging husband, I am continuing in hell in a system which seems more interested in acquiring as much money as possible rather than any kind of justice. This is a system that needs to be completely overhauled.

  27. I handled my divorce myself. I’ve been in the family law career field for 15 years and knew what I’d be up against if we hired attorneys. I settled for far less than what I was “entitled to” in exchange for getting on with my life beginning the day I left the marriage.
    It was brilliant.

  28. I was divorced in October 2008. I had no minor children and was to receive $25k in lump sum support alimony. I signed over my home in Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida and moved out from my home according to the Final Judgment. Approximately one month after leaving my home I had to hire an attorney and filed a motion for contempt. Almost 6 years later I am still fighting, my case is still open and I have not received one penny. Obviously my divorce should have been very simple. When an individual like myself has to contact the FBI and Homeland Security over a simple divorce apparently something is terribly wrong with our legal system.

  29. It’s been 2 years and no end in site.
    I have just gotten a police video tape where my daughter discloses in a sexual abuse investigation that her uncle threaten her with a knife
    Still to this day the courts allow the mother to leave my daughter alone with the uncle
    Where is the protection of the children
    Mothers always get there way even if her family has 4 generations of sexual abusers

    • Mothers do not always get there way. I was a noncustodial mother. I do not drink, take drugs, I have never been arrested and even my last traffic ticket was in the 1990’s. My parenting time was reduced to less than 30%. I paid full child support to my ex and his new wife even though he made 5X’s my salary.

      I had to take him to court to get him to allow medically necessary braces for my daughter. CYS had to get involved to get him to give meds ordered by the doctor for asthma. Twice he fired a .22 INSIDE his home while the children were present but because he wasn’t aiming AT them it was simply considered a “parenting style”.He retained custody.

      I am an LPN, certified parent educator. My ex had such poor judgement he once injured himself jumping off a ladder four rungs from the ground. He fractured his heel into 12 pieces because he was trying to impress someone!

      He sent CYS to my hoke five times in ten years for investigation all of which were UNFOUNDED and listed as Spite reports but he still maintained custody.

      I did sue him for contempt of court for interfering with my parenting time on 35 counts. He never showed up. He got a$250 fine which he had the nerve to ask the judge to reconsider. To his credit the judge did not reconsider. I guess disrespecting your ex is OK but if the judge says be in court you should go.

  30. It should have taken 1/2 the time it did but we both ended up going through 6 different lawyers before we finally settled on the ones we used…..It was like a mind field feeling that it not about you its about them…The first thing they wanted to know your financial situation..”how much money do you have in the company or in your own accounts ? The second attorney wanted me to cash in a bond (I had put away for my daughters college) and give her the money so she could work her fee off it…. What a horrible feeling…The entire process stinks…of Greed….

  31. It’s broken me financially – husband was boesky wannabe but dumber.
    Nevertheless I’m esoteric historian volunteer activist full time phd student. Full time mom to 3 teens. 1 asbergerish tendencies, sadist husband crippled since 2 years old so ungainly limp ang rage to any men who were cute!
    I pray I can find someone to write play on with me! s.
    Many connections + la Jolla playhouse C.
    Help! Rakeli

  32. The reason my divorce process is taking so long is because I have not begun to file yet. I have wanted to since Sept. 2006 and believe it or not, have been in contact with a wonderful lawyer and great person even more important several times in person, through e-mails and phone calls. I have never put aside money of my own for these fees. My husband has been in and out of work quite a lot for many years so it
    was difficult for me to do so. I am now unemployed and have been for the past 2 1/2 years and collecting unemployment, all of which went into the house, we also have two “kids” 37 and 33 still living at home!
    yes, you read it right!!! 🙁 There is much more to this bizarre story. I am and have been looking and struggling to find employment to make enough to move out and on. More importantly, to pay this terrific man and attorney who has not taken a penny in all this time. I cannot wait to file for divorce so long overdue! I do not want to represent myself. Especially since I have been married, again believe it or not, 40 years in December. I cannot expect any money from him as there is none! But I still want the attorney who has been too kind to finally represent me after all these years!

    Toby Lapin

  33. It did not take long for 23 years of my life to share with somone who was out of my life for a cost of $150.00 and 90 days. that was 3 and half years ago and it stiil hurts like HELL !!!!!!!!!!

    • I’m sorry you are hurting, Earnest, but I’m glad you didn’t spend a decade and $100,000 to end up in the same place.

  34. My divorce was in 1997 and it went quick because we ended up filing bankruptcy.
    However in 2007 we went back to court for custody issues and that lasted 6 years until my children aged out of the system. And the court battle is not over yet since my ex put a lien on my house for unpaid ” child support” and blocked me being able to refinance my home.

  35. At the 9 year, 3 month mark, I finally had to bifurcate the issues. She STILL protested, but the judge finally ordered it. (Believed to be the longest divorce in Fresno County.) Six months later we finally resolved the remaining issues. As expected though, custody is still a fight.

  36. My divorce is still pending- I’ve done a lot of it pro se Bc attorneys cost too much.

  37. I am divorced, but not settled. No children involved. Ridiculous, that you can be granted a divorce without settling no motivation by the other side to settle the divorce. I’m in Delaware.

  38. It took about 2 years and have to pay lifetime alimony to a perfectly health ex spouse.

  39. Only in Atlanta does a 90 day hearing occur in the 6th month. Fulton County is the busiest court system in the state, with the family division utterly overwhelmed. Three judges reside at one time and this year, it’s been a revolving door of judges serving for as little as one year. So much for “one family, one judge.”

    Throw a rejected narcissistic into the mix and a defamatory battle you will have!! And that’s what I got. If the system is to stay as it is currently — lawyers, judges, GAL’s — they all need an education on personality disorders. However, with lawyers — on BOTH sides — fanning the flames of the dragon, it’s a wonder we finished when we did. If the narcissist didn’t care about his money so much, we’d still be hashing it out.

    But a preliminary, maybe permanent answer, and I’m no expert, is replace the judges with professional mediators and take away the big money. Or simply refrain from the institution, altogether.

  40. My divorce cost $400,000 (for attorneys, psychologists, accountants and temporary living) and 22 months to get a standard child possession order (father gets 33% of child time) and standard community property distribution (60% mom and 40% dad, when dad has a higher income). The cause for the costs and time spent was my disbelief that a 50/50 child sharing and 50/50 community property distribution were impossible in Texas. There is no equality in Texas. The higher earning fathers are seen as an income source and as a minor parent.

  41. The divorce took 2 to 4 but, the contempt motions are an ongoing pain! Family court does not enforce any court orders. You just keep paying and going back to court to get more orders that the ex refuses to follow. This is a bad version of Groundhog Day!

  42. Had to join in on this one. The judge on my case got divorced from her husband, who was also a lawyer, in 6 months. She allowed my case to be expanded into its seventh year and counting. There were no custody issues, and now no child support issues..there is just the free health insurance my husband has been getting through my job. I removed him after 7 years and was found in contempt of court. Still havent gotten to equitable distribution ..but now it doesnt matter..there is nothing left.

  43. My divorce was final July 1997, and by the end of 2000 my ex had kindapped my 2 daughters (via the court), had me put in jail via complete lies, and destroyed my personal and professiona reputation in the environment I’d built my professional adult career. I spent the next 10 yrs trying to get access to my children (zero success) and ended up in bankruptcy.

    As recent as this past yr my ex informed my attorney (since temporary orders in Jan 1996 she has never uttered a single word to me — only communicates via attorney) saying she will never even respond to anything that doesn’t satsify her “Calculated claim” of what I owe her (some number close to $250,000).

    The children have chosen to dis-own their father’s existence, and as of this past year my very healthy mother went to an unexpected early grave without having been allowed to even mention her son’s name to her two grand-daughters (or they would not speak to her) over this last decade. All of the above not only ENABLED by the courts but actually encouraged and feed into by the courts, in particular because I tried to hold a Judge and his hand picked GAL accountable to the most basic elements of the law. The courts so destroyed all logic and reason my ex will never let go of this till I’m in the grave.

  44. Thru a fraudulent will my son’s father in law made out on his Incapacitated Daughter, the father in law became my sons wife and the divorce settlement is still ongoing after 10 years

  45. We have no assets and our divorce is on it’s third year in the courts. Smart, very aggressive moves are the only reason I still have a mere 5 weeks access to my kids each year.

    We finalized a custody agreement months ago. At the same time, we are both BROKE and have already agreed to split the debt 50/50.

    Her $400/hr lawyer still won’t end it because she thinks I’m hiding a pot of gold somewhere. I’ve been asked to dig up a W2 from three years ago to confirm figures. It’s harassment. If I produce it, they may find something or they’ll just ask for more paperwork.

    A latest threatening email said in bold “So if you have anything that needs to be disclosed, please do that now so that the Judgment is airtight and cannot be overturned in the future.”

    Airtight? We have kids. You must be joking.

  46. Even if ones divorce is over, the constant litigation of child custody and support.. Financial incentives of title iv-d grants allocated to the state.

  47. My total litigation time has been 7 years (3 years divorce, 4 years custody and child support), and over $100K combined. We had $80K in cash, and $20K in retirement, I suggested to put it all in a trust fund for the kids, in a way she and I could not touch it. She refused and said it was all up to the lawyers. Now all the money is gone, my two oldest are starting college, and I am unable to help them very much.

    Point is, the whole damn thing is dysfunctional, family court is dysfunctional. Its like trying to reason with someone who is crazy.

    One of my lawyers was going through a divorce himself and he said: “I would never put himself through the family courts”. Instead of going to court, he gathered as much money as he could, and offer it to his ex-wife to settle the case. And thus he was done in a few months.

    Considering how much time and money I have wasted in all this, I should have done the same. Looking at it back, I think this way I would have saved a lot of time, and perhaps I would not be broke like I am.

    So Pay her off, and get it over it. Going to court you will not get you anywhere and you will waste years of your life.

    • Paying people off to avoid court is a fallacy. Giving 90% of what you have simply arms bitter people to buy lawyers to get the last 10%! People who give everything can be looked up years later for more.

      I was sending over $2,000/month to support the kids. No court. She handed the money to a lawyer to have my custody whittled to nothing because custody = $.

      The only way the system currently works is if the unhappy people on the other end decide to let you go live your life in peace. Bribing them to go away is simply blood in shark infested waters.

      The only end in sight is the promise of reform.

      • Correction: The only way the system works, my dear Anonymous, is when the court-ing spouse is dead. Then you get to see your kids.

  48. The waiting period for divorce did nothing but, drain all the resources I had to defend myself, from a divorce I did not want. The period lasted a year longer than the law required because, my ex waited an extra year before requesting a court date. I did not request one because; I did not want to be divorced.
    During the waiting period I was forced from my home, separated from my child and forced to give more than half my pay check to her. This left me no means to care for myself. If it had not been for family taking me in, I would have been homeless.

    The order for the waiting period, which placed me in poverty plus, exiled me from home and child, was given purely at the request of my ex-wife. There was no discussion on what was fair or just. At the initial hearing I was not allowed to speak. Basically my lawyer was there to tell the judge how much I had so he would know how much he could take.

    In have done some internet research on whether or not waiting periods work. I found supporters who pointed to divorce rate being slightly lower on average in states with waiting periods. However, the actual data is not so cut and dry. Some states with waiting periods are among those with the highest divorce rates.

    What is most troubling is how easy it would be to find out if the wait works by court records. But the courts are not keeping such records. We should be demanding to know why.

  49. My divorce took 6 months to a year. I have been officially divorced foe over four years, and still am dealing with the court system. I also was forced to live with my ex during this process as he would not move out; I had no where to go. I had no access to money, and was not receiving any child support because the peoceedings were not final. I had no access to money because my ex drained the joint acct. and opened a new acct. in his name only. I lived in pure hell for that 6 mos. to a year, because my exm

    • I lived in pure hell during the proceedings because he made it his mission and is obseessed with doing whatever it took/takes to destroy me and ruin me in whatever way he could.

  50. In my opinion a divorce should not take no more than 3 months total and no more than 30 days if the couple has been married for less than a year.

    I truly believe that no one should force to be in a relationship they don’t want. Forcing people to “stay married” is forcing violence.

  51. Having gone through the Judicial circus courts for Domestic relations for almost 10 years, I still have shared parenting as a piece of paper that is issued from every court appearance, The only thing that is common is that you can get all the pieces of paper you want from these courts, they are worthless expensive pieces of toilet paper. If you are a father or a male then you have no ability to enforce them, and some of these can be very expensive but if there is a claim made specifically by a mother or a female then as one judge stated,’If she believes it to be true then that is the law of this court’. In my studies and the common theme of those who are continuous victims of legal workmanship and financial workover. It is my understanding that these courts were formed and then hijacked by the federal government for a very special class of treatment. The overseers of the original policy, Biden, the Clintons and a menagerie of the most evil people ever to gain power and access to congress still to this day play musical chairs and worse still have pen access to the performance and quotas that for reasons beyond most peoples understanding needs family court victims. The product of family court is alienation, financial deprivation and more importantly the transfer and control of wealth and inheritances into the states coffers. The ultimate sacrifice for parents and their paternal side families is the loss of consortium with their relatives both young and old. The system will become so bad that as an example there was a case in South Africa where divorced parents did not realize their children a brother and sister had found each other but not as brother and sister, It is disgusting what the product of this federal grand experiment is producing, and far worse than that their is not a family court Judge that is not practicing policy on American families which means if you are a troubled family then the Judge has orders and federal financial incentives to rule only one way and find the excuses.

    I have also come to the conclusion that feminism is a new state religion,Since this was predicted to be a very expensive legal experiment and many of our children lost to the perversions of state power, we can only rely on the after affects and the ongoing costs to the economy. It really is time for a radical change, I fear the very people who allowed this to happen have not seen the new orders that now remove the only bastion that attorneys had for protection and abuse; The federal and IRS laws changed to remove that little cash club you have and we should start seeing some of your ill gained ‘Hello’ cash subject to the scrutiny of the IRS. So all you people out there who have bills, do make sure that you send them to the IRS. Find out what mechanisms and financial institutions they hide GAL and court fees through as well. These people operate a business like any other, they just call it a court.

  52. It is simple. Bleed the man dry of all that he has, then move on to the next one. keep the kids away because the ex gets more money.

    This is kidnapping, extortion, and a racket to line their pockets!

    This will not stop till there is a revolt by the american people to defy the tyrants!

  53. It will aways take a year or more as long as judges let lawyers run from court room to count room and stall without penalty . As in my case her lawyer was able to bounce from case to case . When your paid by the state and your part of the good o boys they can get awa with it. The judge even said he’s probably smoking and sat and waited for him to show up . If you can’t hold up your case load and be professional they should disbarred or charged by the court or wasting the courts time .

  54. You all speak in years, its not about time, it’s about money… When you run out of Money They settle your case. The more money you have the longer it takes!!! You will never see a lawer continue to represent you after you have run out of money, and the judges loose interest too.

  55. It took 18 months to get a divorce decree but I had to bifucate to get it. I was tied up in court another 10 months to figure out who would get what thru equitable distribution. Then my ex didn’t follow the order so it was another three months to enforce. When I got my stuff 85% of it was broken or missing. No consequences from court for my ex. Judge’s reasoning: He’s upset because she left him.

    Then custody. It took 14 months to shake a report out of the custody evaluator who lied her way thru 68 pages of drivel and tried to terminate my parental rights because she claimed I was “not in touch with reality”. o another six months getting a psych eval on me and 1500 too. Result. I’m not crazy. In fact, I’m very high functioning with no evidence of pathology. Once that was received it was totally ignored.

    I returned to court monthly over five years over every Christmas vacation, every summer, scout camps etc due to ex trying to reduce or eliminate my parenting time and claiming he “Didn’t understand the order”. Again, no consequences. I had to go to court to get him to allow orthodontia which was medically necessary. I had my share of the money and even though he made 5X my salary and collected full support from me he claimed he couldn’t afford the treatment.Then I took him to court for contempt on 35 counts. He didn’t bother to show up for the hearing. The judge finally found him $250 dollars and found him in contempt. He retained custody though.

    Fianlly the judge appointed a GAL who “ordered” me to do exactly what she said in terms of extracurriculars etc. Ex did not have to abide. he used the GAL a a mouthpiece. I walked away. I told my kids who were now 18 and 15 to call me when they wanted to see me.

    My kids are now 25 and 21. I have relationship with both that are happy and secure. I learned near the end of my custody fight that my ex’s new wife’s uncle is a senator! Well, well, well

    I went on to earn an M.Ed. I married my best friend who has loved and supported me thru all the years of the custody fighting. We had two additional children who are healthy and well adjusted. The children tell me their father i not happy in his marriage to the senator’s niece and is suffering with an alcohol related heart aliment. I guess we reap what we sow.

  56. Divorced in 2006. 6 months after getting divorced it started, my ex filed suit over child custody. Here we are 8 years later still fighting over custody. Ive never been in trouble, dont drink, dont do drugs, havent even had traffic tickets since the 90s. Model citizen. This man has had a DWI, still drinks (have photos), been shot at, house was raided, LIVES with his mother and brother majority of the time. Brother also in trouble with the law. This man is unstable. Has moved 8 times un less then 5yrs. He legally adopted my 1st born which he hasnt had anything to do with for the past 6 years. Hes only fighting for his biological son, which he and his family are turning him against me-PARENT ALIENATION!! And not one attorney that Ive hired (Ive had 8 lawyers, yes 8!!!) seems to care enough to help me in this case. This man has also fallen behind on child support twice! He doesnt follow the divorce decree in regards to child custody but he has the audacity to file suit on me to gain sole custody of my son!?? Mind you, Ive remarried and moved on but still getting dragged back to court every year! When does this ever stop!? Something has to be done. No one cares for “best interest of the children”! Theres so much more to my situation this is just a short summery. Time for a reform yes!